I was at a transvestite bar this past weekend,
and one of the things that amused me was the
extreme position the culture takes in opposite
to that which is taken by the transgender
group. There’s this whole business of the
"slut" and "whore" image
that seems like a manifestation of internalized
misogyny. What’s more, the guys tend to "read"
every person in the establishment according
to their outfits. (ie. "Are you dressed
like you want it? or "You are wearing
pants, you must not want sex.")

I have tested this theory by going in on
different nights with different outfits. Suitors
pile on when I don a skirt, while I am treated
like a leper the moment I show up in jeans.
Don’t get me wrong, I think being a prude
who has Victorian hang-ups about sex and is
equally a misreading of what women want. I
have come upon this superannuated concept
of femininity that’s a jarring reaction to
what transvestites normally have to tolerate.

Still, I sometimes wonder if guys enjoy the
*thrill* of the chase? The niceties? The dining
together? Walking together in public? The
sweet kisses at the doorstep? The uncertainty?
The possible wait, the excruciating days where
the sexual drive mounts and grows? I’ve always
thought the "complete routine" added
to the eroticism and the triumph when the
act is finally conceived?

Or do guys actually prefer just walking into
a bar and sticking it in without like….even
getting to know the anonymous partner’s favorite
color?

If the answer is yes, it would not surprise
me much, because I’ve always seen a good portion
of m-t-f transvestism (at some level) as two
men conspiring to create the woman that never
was.

How
to Be a Girl: The Things Every Beginning Transvestite
Should Know

Girls and girls, here is an excellent article
written by Miss Ursula Hitler on the general
points of being a transvestite, not just for
beginners, but everyone else in the office
who is an expert on pretending to appear busy
at work! What a marvelous and disingenous
way of getting constantly hit on by that Google
thug! Just name yourself after the most controversial
figure on the internet! Why didn’t I think
of that! Thanks Ursula!

I’ve always felt that the Achilles’ heel in
the transgender culture is one of class. First
off, there is education. I’ve often joked
that the thing that keeps transgender identity
apart from other trans groups is thirty to
forty thousand words. As in, a doctorate or
thesis. The language that transgender groups
have access to puts it in a group of its own.
Next comes the hormones, the sexual-reassignment
surgery (SRS) . You need to research hormones,
availability, side-effects, prescriptive routes,
approval process. You need counseling for
SRS, traveling expenses to different parts
of the country (or the world), bouts of unemployment.
In the modern day and age of the internet,
how would a transgender person out on the
street do this? Next, there is therapy. Therapy
therapy therapy. How much does therapy cost?
And what happens if the transgendered individual
does not have a job that provides coverage
for transgender therapy?

I can’t help but think of the underclass
and the working girls who are trans-identified.

What do you say to a person who does not
have access to one or all three of these transgender
privileges?

What can you say?

A friend recently asked me to go look over
Yahoo! personal ads with him. As we were pouring
over girls, we came upon a TG who placed hers
up alongside theirs.

For years, I thought my situation was unique:
Married gentleman callers cheating on their
wives, dispatching lip service, wanting sex,
hiding in motel rooms, can’t keep their hands
off you behind closed doors, can’t even walk
alongside you in broad daylight… telling
lies.

This girl’s personal ad had all the aforementioned
gripes.

Perhaps the greatest triumph of the internet
is not bringing diversity into the desktop
of our homes. The greatest triumph of the
internet is making us realize we are neither
snowflake nor unique.

In that manner, a transperson’s only way
to top that triumph is to be unique. Don’t
get hardened. Don’t play into their hands.
Don’t become a statistic. They may take what
they want physically, but deep down inside,
you can’t let them have what really counts.
Because the moment you do, the only thing
you’ve got left is cynicism.

And there’s nothing beautiful about that.