Pristine Angie’s Good Homemaker Adventures at www.d332.com

Avid readers of clinical case studies regarding crossdressers will recognize the motif of responsibility-laden men perceiving femininity as liberation. A typical background will be that of a man who is expected to keep things running: CEO, working class family man, FBI head, governor of New York City. (Oh come on guys, you know he shut down Edelweiss on 43rd because he knew his Marilyn couldn’t hold a candle to the Marilyns downstairs at the old haunt. Don’t lie!) Certainly, not all crossdressers are IPO cowboys waiting to strap on their golden parachutes, but you’ve got to admit, there’s a certain correlation between the reiterations of “freedom” and the Fredericks of Hollywood crotchless satin teddy™.

Now we look at the traditional Asian male, who by tradition, are indentured to familial duties for centuries. Nobody’s to blame of course. What did you expect their women to do when they were hobbling around, unable to find the shoe sizes that fit properly? Like the agricultural family and the tribal configurations, this desktop sociologist believes that a day will come when such outmoded arrangements will go the way of the human tailbone: It will feel like last year’s family to be driving around with fifteen kids in the Dodge caravan, jacking property taxes through the roof where gay couples fume over Domestic Bliss lost, unable to afford their fifth bottle of skincare product.

When you combine the traditional Asian male role type with the simulacrum of dressing for liberation, I think it’s safe to predict that before Tom Cruise and Dreamworks make that disaster movie about the Three Gorges damn bursting, the night under a Sezchaun moon will be exploding with 500 million Stevie Nicks (karaoking You Are The Sunshine of My Life).

But don’t worry. You still got a few good years to Victora Secret’s Annual Oversize grabbag sale.

Last time I checked, China was just entering their Miami Vice phase.

I guess I could quote one of Marianne Moore’s posh poems, but since shooting a beautiful picture of a blossom is about as difficult as taking an attractive shot of a supermodel with a Holga, I think I’ll opt for easy joy today and give the cerebral mindset a rest. So here is my highbrow alternative to start off the week:

There’s a bright golden haze on the meadow,
There’s a bright golden haze on the meadow,
The corn is as high as an elephant’s eye,
An’ it looks like its climbin’ clear up to the sky.

Oh what a beautiful morning,
Oh what a beautiful day,
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
Everything’s going my way.

It’s presently thundering and pouring outside. But I have decided over the weekend to start exploring photography that reveals the inner life of a subject. And these being self-portraits after all….

One would expect to hear gossip about the going-ons at the prom the day after; Kisses stolen within the shadows, romantic tryst by the punch bowl, a whimsical corsage returned to its original owner, or a menage-a-cinq involving the school principal when the janitor, who looked like Fabio, walked in with a - oh wait, wrong entry, never mind.

Yesterday was not only prom night at the LGBT, but also the anniversary of the passing of a parenting unit. Therefore, thoughts about my father’s battle with cancer left me in a meditative mood, talking about Tarkovsky’s survival of artistic spirit in Andrei Rublev, the month-long blossom in the city of New York post 9/11, the foundation of the self, the pursuit of interior calm, and a dedicated awareness of the irrecoverability of time.

Surviving relations of cancer victims have often been quoted as subsequently seeing each day as a gift. It’s a hefty price to pay for such a realization. I can only add to this that each day should be seen not only as a gift, but also, a unique life of 24 hours in its own individual manner.

Not the usual topics one talks about at proms. Is it any wonder why this girl enters and leaves these functions alone, year after year?

At some point or another, one comes across people surrendering to the erosion of time. It’s a ruse, however. To give in at any point would be a bluffed hand played: Time may be elastic to one’s perception, but its unrelentless momentum should never be ignored or taken for granted. Of late, I’ve had many occasions to think about the frequent adult warnings of the world out there among strangers as being “a cold place.” It has always struck me that it continues to be frosty from day one of civilization precisely because each succeeding generation pre-emptively gave in to the cult of distrust for fear of looking gullible. It has always been an achievement in the adult world to look and be secure.

But the price is bitterness.

I think there’s an element of high comedy when people try to pick me up on the streets. It may have something to do with the fact that I’ve never really understood the whole point to cruising, so I never really know what to say. Plus I’m not bitter enough to bite back with a sarcastic remark, so I pretty much talk as if I was at a debutante ball just as a matter social graces. Besides I am an optimist: I always imagine that guys who want what-many-guys-want-but-are-afraid-to-come-out-and-say-it always have the potential to be sweet, loving men, if given the chance. Well, anyway, the reaction on the individual who is propositioning, always tends to fall nothing short of gold. Just tonight, little innocent me is walking down 9th ave on the West Village when a fella comes alongside and starts with the “pssst!” (And this is me dressing like Shirley Winters dressing like Ernest Borgnine, mind you.) So the man starts with a, “you got a really nice ***.” I said, “Well, thank you for your kind words.” Then he goes into a “So, you like ***c* **c*?” And I returned with a “excuse me, I don’t follow.” When he goes to “My name is Jack Frost, and I like to get my **** ****ed,” I reply with these completely unrehearsed lines:

“My name is Pristine, I am pleased to meet you. You are an attractive man, I wish you the best of luck and hope you find what you are looking for.”

Is it any wonder why the standard image I have of men are guys standing in the middle of the street scratching their heads as I depart?

Hello,

I have had to take on jobs and assignments to help keep this website alive. The annual fee is approaching, and I just realized I haven’t kept my donation page actively linked. I have noticed that it takes even more effort to keep d332.com running into it’s 8th year, now that I’m busy working.

If you have benefitted from any information or thoughts on this page; If something I have posted, said, remarked, or written about has changed the way you saw something in your life, please do consider making a donation to keep this site up and running. I would rather take it down than resort my space to adult sites throwing their junk all over my altruistic goals.

I have always told the story of an overheard conversation by a donation box at a small art gallery. The man says to his girl, “This place doesn’t need my donation, other people are donating, why should I?”

A year later, a Starbucks Coffee shop opened in the gallery’s place.

More on the Donation Page

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The Prom is set to start on 8pm April 21 Friday 2006. It is free, for all ages 18+, and there will be no alcohol served. There will be prom king and queen randomly picked from a pool of names. Event last from 8-midnight. There is DJ Ethan Carter working the decks and snacks and refreshments provided, also free prom photos (while film supply lasts). We’re working hard to make this event even more successful than the one last year (about 150 people attended TransProm 2005).

Also, anyone who is interested in volunteering their time and help may do so by simply showing up at our next Trans Events Committee Meeting (next one will be on April 5 Wednesday 6-7:30pm Simply go to the front desk and ask which room TEC (Trans Events Committee) is meeting at. We need people to volunteer for set-up from 5pm to 7pm, shift #1 from 7:30pm to 10.00, shift #2, from 9:30 to 12, and clean-up from 12-1am. Interested individuals can email me (and I will forward your contact info to Paige) or just show up at our next meeting.

Do drop in and help make give our trans* representation greater visibility in the LGBT.

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center 208 West 13th Street, New York City 10011